The learner grows this way...

The true measure of success in mentorship lies in the mentee's ability to replicate their mentor's results effectively

The story of Jesus and his disciples always comes to mind when I think about effective mentorship. However, I will start with mine, and then switch to His’ to conclude my reflection.

Attending a “University” wasn't part of my original plan. I had different aspirations and was already pursuing them before I unexpectedly found myself on campus. Although the environment was different from what I wanted, I couldn't undo what had happened, so I made up my mind to work hard towards achieving one of these aspirations—becoming a media professional. 

Back then, my only media experience was in the press club in junior secondary school, where I served as a hostel reporter and later as an editor. I even had an imaginary media empire with a radio station and newspaper—my only CV entries.

In this new phase, it was time to come out of those imaginations; I needed real experience. So, one day, I searched for media professionals in the city and found some. I reached out to one of them but my first Facebook message to him wasn’t about mentorship; I boldly asked about hosting a radio show on the campus station. 

Shekwonuzhibo was gracious, I am sure he knew I was a “nobody” who wanted to get hold of the profession. We met, and I started interning on his blog—the campus' largest at the time—and the radio station. Real-life experience, huh? That was where it started. 

Our journey began as Facebook friends, evolved into an internship, then roommates, and now he's an elder brother to me. Through this evolution, I learned that the true measure of success in mentorship lies in the mentee's ability to effectively replicate their mentor's results. Even Jesus taught this: “A pupil is not above his teacher; but everyone, after he has been fully trained, will be like his teacher.” (Cf Luke 6:40)

I am not "fully trained" yet, as my friend often says, "I'm still trying to qualify for the job." 

Although he typically worked behind the scenes in the newsroom, Shekwonuzhibo often placed me in situations where I had to take the lead, interact with newsmakers, and share their stories. These experiences took me from one fellowship to another, from one newsroom to the next, and the journey is yet to begin. 

He didn’t get most of these opportunities when he was like me, but he inspired me to aspire to them and more at the same age. As learners, we advance where our teachers stumbled; their scars guide us to avoid pitfalls along the way. 

Jesus spent three years teaching 12 young men to become like Him, their teacher. When he was done equipping them with all to deal with “this kind”, he left. They then took charge and accomplished remarkable work that continues to impact the world to this day. A step further! 

I'm writing this letter from the room Shekwonuzhibo and I shared for two years. When we first moved in, we only had a mattress; we used the windows as hangers, and clothes served as curtains. As time passed, we gradually acquired furnishings. However, when he moved out, I was able to arrange items that we lacked during our initial days together in a few weeks (debt-free!), now that I'm living alone. 

Why? Effective mentorship!!! While we went "window shopping," I observed and took mental notes. As we browsed interior decor designs on Pinterest, I paid close attention. Actions speak volumes beyond the words of the teacher. 

Even these eavesdrops that I write to you are more about the actions than the words that I encounter every day. The lessons are scattered across, but I am hoping you will pick at least one. 

I’m grateful to Shekwonuzhibo, and every mentor I have had and will have on this journey.

Zoom out

• We are a generation of "I want you to be my mentor." Before reaching out, the mentee should be deliberate about their learning goals. Once they have identified and have found a teacher, paying attention to every detail in the process is important. 

• Familiarity shouldn’t build contempt! I moved into his small room in the students’ village, before we relocated to the new place where I now live since he got married. We shared the same bed, ate the same food most times, etc, but it didn’t change my perception of him, he remained my elder brother. No matter how much access you have to your mentor, don’t lose your wonder of him/her.

• The mentor should be kind like Shekwonuzhibo. The mentee is reaching out because he/she needs help. While offering this help, mentors should not withhold information that will aid the learner's growth. Some fear their mentees surpassing them, akin to sharing exam answers and feeling sad when the ‘photocopy’ outperforms the ‘original’. it rather demonstrates that effective learning took place. Imagine the length Jesus’ disciples went, they did double or more of what He achieved. 

• The most beautiful part is that he calls me on some days to ask me questions about certain things that he wants to do, especially when he knows that I have experience with that subject. Other days he asks me to represent him somewhere without the fear that I will fumble, he knows his own. The man is not threatened by my growth, to him, my growth makes certain things more easier for him.

Mentor! Mentee! This is the way, walk ye in it.

*******

🎶 I was writing this letter while listening to ‘Rest on Me’ — David Dam

📚 Current Read: ‘He Leads Me’ by Gbile Akanni.